Wednesday, June 29, 2005

If I had a cap gun and a big wheel.....

I would look pretty silly if I tried to ride to New Orleans.

It's a weird thing breaking somebody's arm. You twist it around so they'll listen to you, but then you here a snap, and the arm gives a little. OOOOPS! I broke it.

Sometimes you see the true nature of a person. They say that real men are forged in the heat of battle. What about the men that aren't real, the cowards. Where are they?

If I had to venture a guess, I would say that the leader lives in New Orleans. He's passive aggressive with a whole lot of anger to type. He reminds me of a Lemur, except he's FUCKING UGLY. I don't just mean looks, I mean all over.

When is a joke, not a joke?

NEVER. It's always a joke. Hence the name, JOKE. If someone is a snooty, judgemental, serious, spiritual, indigenious tribe following, crack in Texas fearing, offensive blog avoiding, partial story hearing, masturbating to a fashion victim doll kind of a person, then maybe they wouldn't be into jokes. That wouldn't be my problem. I'm here to make people laugh, but I can't force them to.

I could force them to eat their own shit, but that would only be fun for me. Although, if this someone does masturbate to a doll then maybe he would like eating his own shit.

I am not allowed in the house of the offended. Which is fine with me. There is nothing that we would have in common anyway. They are beyond me, not in intellect, but in the deep reaches of the cosmos. That is where they are living. They say they are living life and seeing the true world, and we are just living in a delusionary state. Well it sounds like a boring suck ass time, where they are. Give me the fun, carefree life of the delusionary.

There is a fence, and they are living with the gophers under the neighbor's yard. They are down their worrying about the end of the world and the threat of bad spirits. They have alot of worries. Everyone I know, including myself are living on this side of the fence. We are above ground in the shade of a tree. No worries.

Granted it is not all candy canes and sugar plum fairies where we are, but we try and cope. They can't stop the end of the world or fight spirits, but they sure as hell are gonna try.

We are not giving up and becoming cowards. We know our place in the world and we are fine with it. They are scrambling for an identity to find a place in their world, and they think they'll be better for it. (And they call us delusional)

As Tyler Durden said in Fight Club, "Sticking a feather in your ass does not make you a chicken."

Shit happens, people change, and friends grow apart. You never think it can happen to you and YOUR friends, but it does.

You take the good, you take the bad, you take them both, and there you have.....
THE FACTS OF LIFE.

SO BE IT!!!!!!!!!!!

2 comments:

Mrs. H said...

Such great writing! Love you man!

LoveTheDivaPrincess said...

This is great. you are awesome!