Wednesday, February 22, 2006

Awakenings



A very good movie that was based on a true story.

Here's what it was about:
A new doctor finds himself with a ward full of comatose patients. He is disturbed by them and the fact that they have been comatose for decades with no hope of any cure. When he finds a possible chemical cure he gets permission to try it on one of them. When the first patient awakes, he is now an adult having gone into a coma in his early teens. The film then delights in the new awareness of the patients and then on the reactions of their relatives to the changes in the newly awakened.

Now today in the USA Today I noticed this article.

Firefighter dies after return from stupor
A brain-injured firefighter who spoke after a decade in a stupor, giving hope to families of other patients, died in Buffalo. Donald Herbert, 44, was injured in December 1995, when the roof of a burning home fell on him. Deprived of oxygen for several minutes, he ended up blind, was largely mute and showed little awareness of his surroundings. On April 30, he shocked his family with a 14-hour burst of conversation. "He was never as good as he was right after he woke up...but he was pretty good right up to the end," Buffalo Fire Commissioner Michael Lombardo said. Herbert's breakthrough came after his physician began giving him drugs used to treat Parkinson's and other disorders. Dr. Jamil Ahmed said that the medications had shown promise with more recently brain-damaged patients. Herbert is survived by his wife, Linda, and four sons.

First of all I didn't cut and paste that article, I typed by hand from the USA Today. Now the interesting thing to me is that that is just like the exact drug that they used in Awakenings. When you watch the movie you think that these people should be given these drugs for the rest of their lives, but it may have had a slight side effect. I don't know what made Donald Herbert die, but I was thinking that that was so cool that he just came out of it and talked for 14 hours. I don't really have a point, but I thought that it was very interesting. If you haven't seen the movie Awakenings, you should.

Something else that's been going on is my moving. I don't have much to move, but I do have stuff to move. I have been moving little bits at a time, but I have to hurry because I only have until next Tuesday. Another thing that is going on right now is that my car is acting up. Not just the check engine light like it usually is, but the reservoir has a hole in it. My car is constantly getting hot and I have to keep buying antifreeze. It is very annoying.

The other thing is that I am going to be living with Rob. I think that we'll get along and it will be fun, but it's just the fact of getting use to sharing a place again. I haven't had a roommate since 1999 or 2000. I'm sure it will all be fine, but that's what's going on right now.

I have to work tomorrow for 10 hours and then I'm off Friday. Hopefully I'll be able to see some old friends of mine on Friday. I need to hurry up and get the moving done. I also need to go on my trip that I've been wanting to go on. Same shit different day. Hard to save money. I was supposed to be going on May 1st. That doesn't look too likely. I'm in a good mood, but a little somber. Oh well, things will all work out.

I've got my health, my friends, and a good life. Things could be worse.

Sorry that I can't think of much more to write, but that should do you guys for awhile.

Take care everyone, and have a wonderful time doing whatever it is that you do.

I love you all and will write more soon.

Tuesday, February 21, 2006

A few things.......

If you haven't been to our livejournal site then you didn't see this.

http://www.apple.com/trailers/independent/filmgeek/trailer/

It makes me laugh everytime I watch it. Just thought that I'd throw it up here.

Today my cousin told me that he didn't get the job that he thought that he would be getting. I thought that that was the funniest thing. I mean it's sad when someone doesn't get a job, but he had been testing and thought that he was a shoe in. I guess he was wrong. The thing is that his parents just moved out of the house and they left him with 3000.00 dollars and a car. Now he had thought that he would be moving into his own apartment and would be living the good life. He has no idea about the REAL world. I'm not talking about Mrs. H. and I's favorite show on MTV. I'm talking about car insurance, rent, gas, food, cell phone bills, and whatever else you could think of. His parents paid all of that. Now he is having to grow up fast. I think that it's Karma. He's being pushed into the world of life with no clue as to how it works. I think that it will be a wonderful thing to watch. SHIT HAPPENS WHEN YOU SIGN YOUR KIDS OVER TO YOUR EXWIFE, PAY OFF THE CHILD SUPPORT, QUIT A JOB WITH AN HOUR AND A HALF NOTICE, SCREW UP A GOOD RELATIONSHIP WITH A GREAT GIRL, AND RIDE ON THE SYMPATHY TRAIN TO LOSERVILLE. So it's good luck to you my friend. I'll be here to laugh. You make my life so much better by comparison.

Something to go along with that is this. Bad things happen and they make you embrace the good. Carpe deim, Sieze the day. His bad story made me realize that he hasn't experienced the really horrible. I haven't much either, but I've watched a man die. I've seen death and I've seen laughter. He claims that he knows these things, but I don't think that he does. I know that several of you will tell me to tell him how I feel, but there's no use. It wouldn't sink in. He just tries to manipulate the truth and make it someone else's fault. I just enjoy being a spectator for now.

On to other things..........
I have about 8 days to move out of my apartment. I don't have much to move, but I do have to move it. There's only so much a Dodge Neon can hold. I will probably rent a small moving truck or something. I need to start cleaning my apartment. Not much to clean, just the bathroom. I can't wait, it'll be a new beginning in a way. Rob and I get along and May seems cool.

I may be going this Friday to an old friend's house. His name is Darrell and he was the one that got me into old movies. Me and Mike, another old friend, will be driving up north to see him. That will be so cool. I haven't seen them in quite awhile.

Today take time to notice the little things in life. :)

Saturday, February 18, 2006

Like a lost ball

My aunt and uncle are moving to Chino Valley. They will be away from me. They've always lived in the same city for as long as I can remember. I went over today and helped them pack some boxes. I found out that my cousin not only got their car, but they also gave him 3000.00 dollars. Not including the 7000.00 they already paid for his child support. If it were anyone else I would be happy for them, but he doesn't deserve this money. He of course feels that he does. WHATEVER!

My fingers are cold and a little numb on the ends right now. I'm trying to hurry up and type this so I can go to sleep. The feeling will come back soon. I was outside for awhile tonight talking to my cousin.

Anyway, on the way to my aunt and uncle's house I stopped at the cemetery to pay my respects to my grandma and grandpa. It was dark, but I was in the neighborhood. I grabbed the flashlight out of the car and went looking for their headstone. They were buried on top of eachother so there's only one headstone. I found it pretty quick and sat down. I cleaned it off and said hello. My first instinct was to lay on my stomach and put my arms in the earth and give them a huge hug, but that was a little too Japanamation I thought. I talked about how many different things are going on in my life. I cleaned the headstone off. Then I could hear their voices talking. They weren't really talking to me, but it was their voices saying stuff that I've heard them say. I sat there and just stared and thought. I wanted to cry, but I still couldn't. When my grandparents died, seperately, I didn't cry. I was so close to them, yet I didn't cry. I felt a sorrow, but also a happy feeling tonight. I was thinking that I should have brought flowers or something, and that's when it hit me. I pulled the Lego Steven Speilberg off of my key chain and sat him down where the flowers go. It's like I'm sitting there watching them. Very nice.

When I got in the car, I turned on the country stations on my satellite radio. That's what they use to listen to, country. I found a bluegrass channel. There was a song called, "You're like a lost ball." I listened to the song to maybe hear a message. The words I heard were something like, "without me, you're all alone." Not only was it sad for me if it was a message, but it was just a sad song if someone had just left you. I didn't really think that that was a message for me, because I have my dad and my friends. So I'm not really alone. Then again, when they died, I did feel kind of alone at the time. I could always go there and be loved. My one regret is that I never learned how to cook like her. After hearing the song I smiled, because it was a funny song in a way. I was alive, I have people that care for me and I care for them, and I just had a good moment in life.

Feeling coming back to my fingers now.

Life is good all around.

Friday, February 17, 2006

Good conversation and Superman

I am watching Mrs. H's house. When I got here after work, Linda (Mr. H's mom), was here watching Taylor. Her and I had a long talk about everything. We talked about racial issues, her exhusband Fred, my dad, Vietnam, people in Iraq, the assisnation of J. F. K., M. L. K., and R. F. K., her protest against Goodyear tire company, religion, radio, television, the raising of children, and my wacky mother. Good conversations with a good person. I thoroughly enjoyed it. So interesting. Sometimes you don't take the time to have your loved ones tell you about their life.

My friend Serjio and his brother did this thing where they recorded their father telling his life story. He told me that he found out a bunch of stuff about his father that he didn't know. He said that I should do it with my father, and I told him that I would. I really wish that I could have done that with my grandma and grandpa. I think that it'll be very interesting.

While talking religion with Linda, I was telling her about these coincidences that I have happen to me. I also told her that I don't believe in God as a faithful follower. I explained to her that I read that to some people these coincidences are signs from God. As she listened to some of my coincidences, she said that maybe they are signs from GOD. For some reason, I don't know why, but that stuck. I mean I had always thought that maybe they were, but I guess I was waiting for a bigger sign. When all the time I've had them in front of me. My question to her though was, "Why would my dad have them happen to him too, if he believes in God?" She said, "It's God reminding him that he's there." I think that makes sense.

Who knows though, I'll have sit and think on this pretty hard.

After she left about 1 AM, I watched Arrested Developement and Battlestar Gallactica. It was the final 2 hours of Arrested Developement. I hope that it gets picked back up for another season by some other station. Fox didn't renew it. Battlestar Gallactica was good as always, and it made me tear up. THE BEST SHOW ON TELEVISION RIGHT NOW ALONG WITH 24. I know that you people are saying, "What about Lost?" Well Lost isn't as good as it was last season, but things could change. Plus none of you have been watching Battlestar Gallactica. I'm talking the new one, not the old one. Too cool for school.

After that I got onto my myspace account and found out that Joe Rogan and Chris Angel have signed on as my friends. Then I was surfing the internet and looked up movie trailers. I watched the Basic Instinct 2 trailer, and then looked up some Superman Returns video blogs. Very cool stuff.



I can't wait for this movie. I'm a huge Superman fan. They are going to do this one as if Superman 3 and 4 never happened. How cool is that? The guy that they got to play Superman/Clark Kent/Kalel, looks just like Christopher Reeve. It's going to rock.

Have a wonderful day and I love you all.

Wednesday, February 15, 2006

Really lazy day

It really sucks when it's your day off and you sleep it away. I went to bed at about 11:30AM and woke up at 11:30PM. Now, I was supposed to wake up at 6:00PM and come and hang out with my friend, but no I ended up sleeping all night. I know that some of you may say, "Phillip it's your day off. Do what you want to do. Sleep as long as you want." This is true, but I just like to be up when other people are up.

When I awoke I had 10 messages on my voice mail. Some were from yesterday and others were from today. Most of it was about work. AAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGGGGG!!!!
To sound like Brig. I delt with that and then came over to Mrs. H. house. I watched some show or two that I had recorded and then I watched a couple that her and I had recorded. Now while I'm at work she can watch the other shows. I still have my own shows to watch, but I'll do that on Thursday. Then I got on the internet and did what I'm doing now. I am leaving as soon as I am done here.

Now to flash back to yesterday.........
Mrs. H. was getting Valentine's day cards ready to give to the kids on valentine's day. I said, "That's just odd. My parents never gave valentine's day cards to me." She said, "That's cause I'm a good parent." I had nothing to say, but I still thought that it was a little odd. You know I gave valentine's at school and stuff, but never at home. Mrs. H. went outside and put the cards in her van, and was going to give the kids the cards when she got home after work. Anyway, in the morning when I went to leave I saw something stuck to my driver side window. It was a valentine's day card. It made me smile real big. I was so happy. Thanks Mrs. H.

Something else that I was thinking about as I was watching the t.v. show HOUSE, was the way the human body works. I mean it's just simply amazing. The way we are as a human being. Our soul, our minds, our fingers, our entire fucking bodies are way cool. So intricate, and so awesome. It's almost beyond imagination. I mean the sperm joins the egg and voila......We're here.

I have to work tonight from 7PM to 6:30AM. It is so awesome, I watch a ballroom. You see some type of a function happens and they set up a bunch of stuff in a ballroom. Then at night when everyone goes to their rooms, they need a guard to watch all the stuff in the ballroom. That's what I do, but wait there's more. At about midnight the hotel security goes around and locks all the doors leading to the ballroom. They can only be unlocked by hotel security or the guy inside. So basically everything is safe, but they want to make sure. "So gee Phillip, what do you do?" Well I watch a couple of movies on my portable DVD player. How fucking cool is that. I get paid $12.50 an hour to watch movies. Sounds like my dream job. I can't believe it. Now I'm not doing anything that I'm not supposed to do. The owners of the company tell us to take our laptops or dvd players with us.

Sometimes I LOVE MY JOB.

I love everybody and I hope you all have a wonderful day.

P.S. Mrs. H., I watched Crumbs from last week, Four Kings, My name is Earl, and the 23 minutes of 24. Plus my shows, but I already erased those. I will watch the others on Thursday. I'll call you later.

Tuesday, February 14, 2006

Love is GREAT


Here it is Valentine's Day and I'm without a valentine. HHHHHHHHHHHHMMMMMMMMMMMMM?

What to do. Oh well, I've gone this long without someone, I'm sure I can go a little more.

Love is so great. I don't know if some people even realize how good they have it? Love can also hurt at times, but most of the time it is the best thing in the world. Well I don't have much to say on the subject. I thought that I would start to write about Love and Valentine's day and the shit would just start pouring out. NOPE. I wrote before about love when my cousin and his girlfriend broke up. That was very good and from the heart. I hope someday that I will find love. When I do I don't care if it chews me up and spits me out, or just keeps chewing me up for the rest of my life. Love is great.

Last night while Mrs. H. and I were at Red Lobster the waitress asked if we were there for Valentine's Day, and Mrs. H. said, "God no, look at him! Why would I be with THAT?" I started to smile, but then the waitress looked at me and said to Mrs. H., "Yeah, you're right. Sorry I offended you." I was so hurt. HAHAHAHA

No everything was fine, and we had a good time. Mrs. H. didn't answer the waitress in that way. She just informed the waitress that she had a husband. The waitress then understood that we were just friends. Unless we were cheating on her husband. Which is what it could have been, but the waitress seemed to know that we were friends. 15 years ago, Mrs. H. would answer the waitress "No, he's JUST a friend!" I would say, "You don't have to yell it out so fast before she can even finish her question, and you could say it with a smile instead of a look of disgust." She would say, "Whatever.", but then she started answering in a nicer way. Now all is well.

It's even better now, because we play these little games with the waitresses. Like the waitress will say, "Are you guys on a date." We'll say, "Yes." Then as we're talking to the waitress, I'll ask Mrs. H., "Should we ask her?" Mrs. H. will look the waitress up and down, and smile. Then she'll say, "Yes, ask her." Then I say to the waitress, "We are into threesomes, and sometimes I like to watch. Are you interested?" Then the waitress usually says, "GOD NO, look at you guys. Why would I be with someone like you two?"

To my best friend in the whole world:

I would like to appologize for not remembering when we met. I feel bad for not remembering, but there are plenty of things around that time that I remember and you don't. I'm not talking about the stuff that you don't want to remember, I'm talking about other stuff. Although I did appreciate you going down on me at your mom's apartment when we were on lunch in high school. OOOPPPSSS. This backspace button doesn't work.

I know that you'll just say, "YOU WISH" I'll say, "yes I do." Then I'll cry myself to sleep. You are wonderful friend and I am glad that we are so close and have been through so much. I always try to put into words how I feel about you and I can't. I am almost getting teary eyed, but maybe I'm just tired. Who knows? I love you and all the good times that we've had and continue having.

Have a beautiful day and a wonderful Valentine's Day everybody.

Friday, February 10, 2006

Lazy days and Mondays


I know that it's not a Monday, but it was a lazy day today. I went to bed at 8:30AM and my alarm went off at 4:30PM. I woke up and thought, "Wow, I feel well rested." Then I rolled over and went back to sleep. That is my hugest downfall. Finally I woke up at 6 or 6:30PM. I thought, "Oh shit I slept too long. I wanted to go run some errands and stuff." I went in the living room to get ready for work, laid down on the couch, and fell back to sleep. I woke up at 8:22PM. I always feel bad when I have things to do and don't do them, but then again I do love my sleep.

Then as I was getting ready to leave the house, I realized that I had like 8 voice messages. I checked them. 2 were from Mrs. H. and 6 were from workers of mine. I set on the phone for almost 20 minutes with one of my guys because he keeps flip flopping about where he wants to work. Then another guy wanted to have more hours, which is almost impossible because you can't get blood from a stone. The last guy forgot what I had told him this morning when I called him at 6:30AM. Finally all of that was taken care of. Then as I am almost to Taco Bell for a little dinner for Mrs. H. and I, I see that my dash is showing that my motor is getting hot. I need to buy antifreeze. I'm figured that I would wait until I get the food, before I get the antifreeze. After getting the food, I head right over to Circle K. When I turn the corner I notice that one of the containers of food slides off of the other one. I stop the car and put it back on. That's when I realize that they gave us an Enchirito instead of a Meximelt. I need to go back, but first the antifreeze.

After putting in the antifreeze, I head back over to Taco Bell. No mind you, I always check the bags of food to make sure that we get what we ordered. This time I didn't because I wanted to cool my motor down before it got into the red. Anyway, I go into the Taco Bell and I'm waiting for service for about 5 minutes. Finally someone comes up to the counter from the back. I order what I was supposed to get and they made it for me. Plus my money back, and the Enchirito. Too cool.

I know that other people will say that I am a baby. That worse things could happen to me. I understand that. I was just saying that it all happened today, but it's all over with now. It's 4:25 in the morning and I'm writing a blog and now all this talk of Taco Bell, I'm hungry.

Sorry if this blog bored you, but I didn't really have anthing exciting happen to me. I just slept.

Talk to you all later.

I love you all.

Love and kisses on all your pink parts, except you Rob.

Thursday, February 09, 2006

Such a good day


I had a wonderful day today. I was still fiddling with Mrs. H.'s radio when she woke up. I then told her that she had to go outside and see what I got her. She was going to stay home from work, so I had to make her go outside and look in her car. She knew what it was as soon as I told her that she had to go look in the car.

I bought this gift for her for all she does for me, and for being a good friend. I enjoy buying things for people, especially when they appreciate it. She is so happy, and that in turn makes me happy. Of course also she'll be able to hear Howard Stern again. Anything is better than Adam Carolla.

After she got Rylee up, we all went outside and looked at the radio. She was giddy and happy. Mr. H. was a little upset, because he doesn't even have a radio. Plus, the fact that all I buy him are cheap DVDs. Then Mrs. H and I went to Circle K before Mr. H had to go to work. We listened to her new radio. When we got back to her house Mrs. H. got on the internet to look up more satellite stuff and I played with Rylee.


What fun we had. I pretend to sleep like Jeff on the Wiggles. She says quietly at first, "1, 2, 3" and then she yells, "WAKE UP JEFF!" I jump up as if I was startled awake. She laughs a genuine hearty laugh. That makes my heart happy and gives me a laugh. Then we played blocks and made all the little people and animals get in line to go to the "Circus Camp" (That's what she called it.) We would build a tower and then she'd tear it down. Then she'd build it up and then say, "Higher". It was so much fun. While she was in her Spiderman outfit I would help her climb the walls. She thought that that was fun. So did I.

Next thing I know Mrs. H. tells Rylee that she has to take a nap. Rylee asks, "Is Phillip leaving?" We tell her that I am not and she is happy.

After putting her down for her nap, Mrs. H. and I continue to surf the internet and talk. Mrs. H showed me that she put Rylee's link and Rob's link on my blogspot, and she put a picture of Rylee and I up on Rylee's site. I was so happy. That was very cool of her.

Then we started realizing that we better get some naps in because she'll be up soon. I look at the clock as I'm laying down and it was 3 PM. I had been up since the night before at 8 PM. I was tired, but it was all worth it. I would gladly miss sleep for the chance to hang with my sister and neice.

I woke up to Rylee waking me up and we started playing right away. I have such fun, and I think she may too. We all had subs, and Rylee went to bed. Such a good day. I hope that Mrs. H. isn't upset because I wrote about the day, because maybe that's what she was going to do.

I was also able to hear from Brig and the kids about the belated Christmas gifts that I sent them. They liked them alot. That makes me happy.


Well I am tired and am going to drop something off at my aunts house. I will be back here tomorrow.

I love everyone and I hope that you all have a very lovely day.


Wednesday, February 08, 2006

My best friend


I just did the coolest thing. I bought my best friend a Sirius radio for her car and paid for a one year subscription. I may wait around to see her face. It felt so cool. I know that she will love it. Since getting mine I have only listened to regular radio when I have to charge my cell phone. She will love listening to Howard on her short ride to work, or to the 80's station which she loves to listen to online.

It is so great to give a gift from your heart. I am so happy right now. I came over here to her house, grabbed her car keys while she's sleeping, and set the whole thing up. I want to go wake her up and drag her outside to see and hear it. I just can imagine her face when she gets in the car and turns on the ignition, and on pops the satellite radio. It'll be so great. Although, I did put a brochure that shows all the channels on her steering wheel, so she will know before she turns the ignition.

The radio was even cheaper than what it was marked. That's always cool. I know that you are all saying that I should be saving money.

Well......SUCK IT!

I bought this gift for my friend. I always buy her little gifts and now I've bought her a big one. The money thing has changed anyway, because now I am moving in with Rob. Which means that I was going to move out of my apartment and go on my trip, but now I will be living with Rob and when I go on my trip I will be paying rent while I'm gone. Not to mention the fact that my car has to be tuned up. The check engine lights been on for 9 months now.

Anyway, this is not about me. It's about my best friend Mary. HAHAHAHA! You thought that I was going to say Mrs. H. Nope. Why would I say that? She is ONE of my best friends, but I do have others. If I said that I bought this thing for Mrs. H., then I may have to buy one for Brig as well. Then I'd have to buy for another friend and another friend. It would never stop. So I am saying that I am buying for Mary and "Mary" knows why. OOOPS I hope nobody's on to me.

I LOVE YOU WITH ALL MY HEART MRS. H.

To quote Britney Spears, "OOOOPS, I did it again."

Tuesday, February 07, 2006

Borrowing trouble and causing my own


My big problem back in the day was always talking about what I knew nothing about. Well somethings don't change. First off is the fact that I wasn't even censored by my cousin. That was all brought on myself. I had asked her if she liked my myspace profile and she said, "I didn't like that shitting on kittens thing." I told her that I thought it was funny. She said that it wasn't funny to her. Suddenly that night I am on my myspace profile and I delete the the shitty kittens. Then in my head I start thinking, "What the fuck? Why did I do that? Who the hell is she to tell me what I can put on my own damn site?" Gee, all that came from, "It's not funny to me." My problem was that she had linked me to her site and I started to become self conscious of what I was writing. I started thinking that maybe I shouldn't write certain things, and just worrying about what her friends might think. Not realizing that it is the internet and if they don't like it they can just leave the site and maybe or maybe not come back at a later time.

So, I write this whole big thing about censorship and my cousin. Then I'm talking to her and she's like what the fuck, I never said that. I was like oh yeah you didn't did you. DUH! That's me assuming things. I'll get to that in a little bit. Then Brig tells me that she had always been going to my site before she had linked me. I realized that she had, and I was totally out of line the entire time. I had in fact borrowed trouble. My cousin believes in the fact of no censorship. So all is well with my world.

ALMOST.....

The other night I had a conversation with Brig and then with Mrs. H. and back and forth. I had ASSUMED something was one way, when in fact it was not. I should have kept my mouth shut, because then I unleashed hell. The kind where you know that you were wrong so all you can say is, "Yes" or "I know." When it was all over and the smoke cleared, I checked for blood from where my head had been chewed off. There was none. I rested and shook it off. I had not been trained to battle this kind of tongue lashing. In the end all was well, and the crisis will hopefully never happen again.

3 ways are probably nice, but 3 way conversations suck ass.

Now, something else that I wanted to talk about was this guy in Yemen that escaped from jail. The thing is that he was a suspect in the bombing of that naval ship over there. They captured him and put him in a Yemen jail. The thing that gets me is that it was a U.S. ship that this guy may have bombed. The way he escaped from jail was to tunnel out. WHAT THE FUCK! Tunnel out? He should have been in U.S. custody, but it sounds like he was in a shitty Yemen prison that he could just tunnel out of. Very strange. I could look the story up, put a link to it, and then there would be no question. The problem is that I don't want to do that because then I couldn't write what I'm writing and I would have to find the story. It is late, and we will all find the story soon enough. Just an odd little thing that I thought was funny when I heard it. You know, that they didn't have this guy under heavy security. Then again, if you think about it, our government could have set up the escape so that he will lead us to the higher ups. Then again, maybe that's just my creative side taking over. I'm sure that some of you just may not care.

Change of topic. Something that I heard the other day on Meet the Press with Tim Russert, was (I know that right now Mrs. H., Diva Princess, and Stephanie are all thinking that I must be two people. Why the hell would I watch Meet the Press?) about Terry Schivo. They have come out with a statement that said that she was, "massively and irreversably damaged, blind, and her brain was half the size of normal." That's for those of you who may have thought that it wasn't right to pull the plug.

Speaking of that. If I do a living will, I want there to be specifics in it. Which are hard to define right now. Like I wouldn't want to get in a car wreck and maybe I have to breath with a machine. Then my dad or Mrs. H. comes up and says, "Well Mr. Lawyer um yeah he said that he didn't want to be dependant on a machine." Maybe I would be paralyzed and I couldn't move to stop them. So I would yell, "Please don't, that's not what I meant." I'd be fully coherent. Then Brig would walk in and talk with Mrs. H. Brig would say, "He told me once that what he meant by a machine was one that worked his heart, breathing, and eating." Mrs. H. would say, "He said to me dependent on a machine, Period." I would be listening to this as they're feeding me my chicken fried steak and crappy tapioca pudding. Everytime that I would be about to talk they would shove food in my mouth. They would stand there in front of me arguing the meaning of my living will. The conversation would go nowhere, and they would have to flip a coin to decide if I live or die. The decision would be DEATH. They would pull the plug together, with tears in their eyes. The last thought that I would have is, "3 way conversations suck."

Have a good day everybody. No worries. One love.

Thursday, February 02, 2006

Just being me


I've realized that since my cousin has been reading my blog and my myspace that I have been censoring myself. That is not right. I even went back to myspace and changed something that I wrote because she didn't like it. I thought it was funny but she didn't like it.

I had written in the about me segment on myspace that I like to shit on kittens and punch old ladies in the neck. Now, I don't really like to do those things, but it's so outrageous that it makes me laugh. I find the visual of it funny.

Maybe I am a sick fuck and am not right in the head, or maybe I'm just being me. Other people find that funny. They know who I am, and what I'm about. This is nothing against my cousin, it's just that I don't want to be censored anymore. I have to figure out what to write or how to write it so she and her friends aren't offended. I like that people read my blog, livejournal, or myspace. I just don't want to have to pander to my audience.

Allow me to switch directions for a bit.

Now, I know that Howard Stern is like religion and politics. You just don't discuss him with people who don't like him because there is no explaining why you like him. You can't make people understand why it is that you listen to him.

Well the other day I was listening to Howard and he had Jenna Jameson on. He had gotten a thing for his birthday called the Sybian. It's a little saddle like thing that a woman can sit on, it vibrates, and it will get her off. The cool thing for Howard Stern fans is that he can do things on Sirius that he couldn't do before. When Jenna Jameson came in he asked her if she wanted to try it out in the studio for him on the air. She said that she would, but no insertion. She pulled her pants down, keeping her panties on and sat down on it. Gary the producer turned it on and she started breathing heavy. Howard informed her that he didn't want her to be fake, he wanted a real orgasm. Gary then turned it up higher and then a little higher. When he got to the medium setting she came.

It was very interesting to listen to. I was thinking WOW this is great radio. Shortly after that P. Diddy came in and was telling Howard how great that was. I know that maybe nobody cares about this, but I just thought it was great.

Afterwards, I went into my apartment and started Jacking oooooo. Kidding. I went in and put on my DVD of Private Parts, the Howard Stern movie, and watched that. The cool thing was how unconventional he was when he started. He had these wild ideas and then the government or the radio station would shut him down. After the movie I thought, "Wow, he's come so far."

You may not care, or hate to admit it, but Howard Stern is a genius of radio.

Just listen to Adam Corolla or David Lee Roth in the morning. Then tell me if I'm wrong.

The point of this was two fold. The fact that I am who I am, and that's all that I am. Popeye said that. Not that I'm anything like Howard Stern, but if I want to be me, I've GOT to be me.

I wrote this huge blog about how I'm not two people, then I come back and start changing the way I write and the things that I've already written. If I'm not two people then what the fuck am I doing. I understand that certain people don't like certain things, but I don't get upset over things that I don't like. If it's a joke, I see it as that. If it's not, I see it as that too. I just really had to get that off my chest.

P.S. Howard Stern just gave Robin, his cohost, a new Mercedes. I thought that was really nice. He gave it to her because of the good work she's done all these years. No real point I just thought that it was really cool. Before the show was over he told her that he needed her after the show. Then as soon as the mikes were off he got up and walked her to the elevator, they went down to the basement level, he walked her by the loading docks, and then they arrived at a garbage dumpster. Next to the garbage dumpster was a car. She thought that she saw a ribbon on a box in the car, then she realized that the ribbon was on the car. She was so excited because she has always wanted this car.

This isn't to try and change you perspective of Howard Stern. It's just to show you something nice that he did. I thought that it was cool, but then again I've been listening for the past 10 years. I feel like I know them.

That's all I have to say about that.

I love everyone.

Have a good day at work, or home everybody.